The first steps towards splitting up can be the hardest to take, particularly if the decision to separate wasn’t yours.
The percentage of marriages that end in divorce is in decline according to Office for National Statistics data, although those in their sixties and beyond are bucking this trend. In England and Wales, between 2005 and 2015, the number of men divorcing aged 65 and over went up by 23% and the number of women of the same age divorcing increased by 38%. This compares to an overall 28% fall in the overall number of divorces over this period.
One thing that separating couples may worry about or feel is unfair, is the fact that the reasons for divorce don’t necessarily affect the financial outcome. However, it’s useful to have an understanding of when and why you can get divorced, and what the divorce process involves to simplify the early stages.
Here, we explain the first steps in the divorce process, and where you can seek further help.
If your relationship is ending, and you need help dividing your money and property or making arrangements for your children, amicable is a trusted legal service for separation and divorce. Unlike solicitors, amicable works with couples and offers a fixed-fee service that includes VAT to help manage all aspects of separation so that you can agree on the best way forward for your family and your finances. Get in touch to explore how they can help you separate in a kinder, better way.
The grounds for divorce
You need to consider on what grounds you’re filing for divorce before you can start the process. In England and Wales, there are five possible reasons for divorce:
- Adultery
- Unreasonable behaviour
- Two years separation with consent
- Two years desertion
- Five years separation without consent
Unreasonable behaviour has often been cited as the reason in cases when none of the other options apply, if spouses do not want to remain married any longer.
In Scotland, the rules are different. You can get divorced after a year’s separation with consent and after two years without consent, but desertion is no longer accepted as a ‘fact’. If you live in England or Wales, you cannot get divorced until you have been married for a year, whereas in Scotland there’s no minimum waiting period.
Read more in our article Divorce laws: the basics.
No-fault divorce
Divorce laws were relaxed on 6 April 2022 to allow for ‘no-fault’ divorces, without the need to prove unreasonable behaviour. The changes were designed to modernise the divorce process for couples in England and Wales, with a divorce allowed after waiting just six months with a sole or joint statement by one or both parties. You now don’t need to submit any further evidence that the marriage has broken down.
How long will the divorce process take?
This depends on your personal circumstances, and whether you seek legal advice and have to go through the courts. If you cannot agree on the grounds for divorce, or it’s a particularly acrimonious split involving custody and financial disputes, chances are, it’ll take longer and the process will cost more money.
However, if it’s a relatively straightforward case, getting a divorce finalised can typically take anything from around six months to about a year.
Divorce outside England and Wales
If you’re getting divorced, it’s important to get the right advice before decisions are made and before divorce proceedings are started.
Bear in mind that if either of you are from a country outside of England and Wales (both Scotland and Northern Ireland are different countries for the purpose of divorce) or one or both of you lives in another country (even temporarily), you may have a choice about where divorce proceedings start.
This is important because the financial consequences may be very different in other countries. If this applies to you, get advice from a lawyer who deals with international cases.
Divorcing amicably
More divorcing couples than ever are seeking ways to go through the separation process amicably, without the need for lawyers.
Sometimes divorce lawyers can fan the flames of animosity, which invariably only results in higher divorce costs and more emotional pain all around.
Of course, you don’t have to use a lawyer to divorce (although if there are financial issues to be resolved or you have concerns about your children you should take advice). You will find all of the information and forms that you need on the Gov.uk website.
How much does getting a divorce cost?
There’s a £593 fee for making a divorce application. However, you may be able to get help paying the fee if you cannot afford it, and you can find out more about available help with divorce costs here.
If you believe your partner should be paying the fee, but you are petitioning for divorce, you can tick a box on the form to ask the court to consider making them pay for this. If they agree during the process, your partner must repay you once the divorce is finalised.
Of course, the actual cost of divorce can run into thousands of pounds, as you’re likely to need advice on separating your assets and, if you have them, working out how best to arrange custody of and financial support for your children. According to Money Helper, the average cost of a divorce in the UK stands at a total of £14,561 in legal fees and costs, but of course, the amount you’ll end up paying will depend on your individual circumstances.
Financial settlements on divorce
Divorce lawyers are often asked in the early days how much someone may receive or have to give up when they get divorced. It’s quite difficult for them to give a direct answer as cases vary (except in Scotland, where guidelines are more closely adhered to), but in very broad terms, you can usually expect to divide equally all your assets (such as your home, investments, pension, etc) that have been accumulated over the course of your marriage.
Only a very small percentage of financial settlements are decided by the courts. Most divorcing couples make their own arrangements either directly or with the help of a lawyer or mediator. If you do this, get the agreement ratified by the court so that your ex can’t make claims against you later.
Find out more about financial settlements in our articles Sorting out your finances when a relationship ends and How are pensions shared in divorce.
Seeking support
If you need emotional support, the relationship counselling service Relate deals with marriage and relationship breakdown as well as helping couples stay together.
You may find it easier to talk to someone you don’t know, or you might hate the idea of opening up to a stranger; either way, make sure you have a network of support you can call on when things feel particularly difficult.
If your relationship is ending, and you need help dividing your money and property or making arrangements for your children, amicable is a trusted legal service for separation and divorce. Unlike solicitors, amicable works with couples and offers a fixed-fee service that includes VAT to help manage all aspects of separation so that you can agree on the best way forward for your family and your finances. Get in touch to explore how they can help you separate in a kinder, better way.
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